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Comments
Love David, and his obvious replacement Brian Cox, but it's another nature lover named David that always tickled me; Bellamy.... of the Bronx. Nether World, the book. Reading now. Good to hear they were naughty back then as well.
Thank you and particularly for the "accent" reminder. Strewth!
@bluepunk, Cars What : A Good Song! I don
t understand the text that much ;-) ( from Germany). Reminds me of the Tubes that I loved back in times. Wish I could mix Voice like you do. I hear that when Guitar has a pause. ( Which is a little relief for my old ears) Drums like yours id like to have for such a Song! Can´t express more in english. Like that Work!@ Derek. Last Day in J.: Wow That`s a sound! In Auria?
@richardyot show me something wonderful. Like this song. Give it less reverb and I will hear it in my car many times.
You express yourself perfectly well my friend. I thank you for your kind words. I'm far from there yet but even my beautiful wife says she's noticed improvements because of this Club. Stick with it and enjoy the journey. It is fun and brings much happiness.
@bluepunk: I´ll stick with cause i like the kindness in this forum. But seems to be that I´m the only one who likes funky/jazzy music in here.
Not at all. Although my own music is not in that genre, I love both funk and jazz. @theconnactic has done some Latin-tinged jazzy/funky stuff in the past, and back in the day @bsantoro posted some jazz influenced tracks.
Anyway it's good to have a mix of styles, makes life more interesting.
Here's one of those classics I mentioned in my comment on your track @Franketti, a classic from 1969, with a great flute intro:
Hey, @richardyot and @Bluepunk: thank you very much for the kind words!
I already listened to all of this month's songs up to now. I'll post my reviews tonight, or tomorrow night.
All the best!
Backing Vocals Woman? Chick in the Next Room Recorded without Permission?
Anyway....constructive (hopefully) criticism: I suspect, especially -it felt- in the second half, that you might have 10% too much R on this. I know, like saying take a little sugar off the donut, very difficult.
If you ever revisit this I might have a look at how you sing the word repressed, seems to stick out a bit, probably just micro-phrasing (unless it's the ghost of Doctor Freud etc).
I think the main verse melody is a bit one-noted, which does help show off the rest of the melody when you take off. I want to say it could even be a bit slower to allow you more room to bring variance through delivery/phrasing again, but I'm being very picky for a SOTMC piece.
Overall I like it. I think it's a small song. I don't mean that pejoratively at all. Some songs, like films, are better off that way. It has a sadness and -for me- the best of it is to be felt in the wistfulness which if the whole thing was bigger ("Quick, lads, bring in the choir and the orchestra...") would be lost, which would be a pity. The questions you ask here are as if one to one and that intimacy is frailer (and better for it) with the shade of Nick Drake, rather than anyone or thing more bombastic....
So far I have a
Still hopeful.
Thanks for the detailed feedback. I'll definitely dial back the reverb - it's partly because I'm slightly too in love with Pro-R, and I've always had a tendency to over-egg the 'verb anyway, but also partly because I only have headphones while my stuff is in storage. I would normally run the mix through my speakers as a sanity check, and on speakers it's much easier to tell if the reverb is overdone. On headphones it always sounds sweet, on speakers too much reverb sounds like, well too much reverb.
I always joke that my favourite films are the ones where people just sit around talking, Dazed and Confused and Before Sunrise for example (but anything by Richard Linklater fits the bill), or Ang Lee before he went to Hollywood (Eat Drink Man Woman being a particular favourite), or The Ice Storm, Five Easy Pieces etc... Because I like that intimate examination of human fallibility and the low-key look at people's lives. And that's exactly what I try and do in my songs, with varying success. Lyrically I think this one lacks focus to be honest, even I don't really know what it's about, it could do with more precision and more concrete imagery, but it's obviously ploughing the same furrow as all my other songs: what it is to be human, to grow old, and to face one's limitations.
As for the backing singer, I gave up waiting for Tracy Thorn to return my calls, so I hired this girl instead:
@richardyot Ah, Mrs and Mrs Phrase-Morph's young belter....well, she was a nice addition, and you didn't overuse her, in fact I had to listen a couple of times to track her down, but that's perfect, all atmosphere etc. As for the movie choices, we are of the same mind....on many days, going to school on the 267 to Hammersmith, I could drift away for an hour quite happily eavesdropping on some nearby conversation...
Nice, good to hear a doomy, interesting chord progression. Lead guitar could perhaps do with a bit of smoothing out, especially where it's exposed at the end.
Loved the raw guitars and the drums.
I love funk and jazz so this was an enjoyable listen for me. Quality playing.
I like the spiky new-wave type vibe. You should have more faith in your voice, it's sounding good.
Just great stuff. Love the Floydy/Gongy psych sound. Really deserves a few tweaks of the production to make it shine... cut a bit of bass off the vocals/add some treble to make them less muddy perhaps.
Really enjoyed the atmospheric sounds, big reverb etc. Beautiful double tracked vox on the chorus. Well done.
Very much appreciate all production suggestions—I learn so much from listening and reading in these SOTM threads. Great musical community!
@richardyot
Am certainly hearing incremental improvements in your contributions. You've found the right register and delivery for your voice with this one. It's a tad loud in the mix for my taste. The outro is pretty interesting / avant garde. The only criticism is that I find the bass line to be too staccato, perhaps a more sustained one might flow a bit better (?)
Thanks for the feedback, that certainly gives me food for thought. I was also starting to think the vocal was a tad loud, so that's definitely a change to consider.
The bass line is rather basic, done in Madrid, I can certainly revisit it to add more sustain.
I did love Bauhaus until I found out they came from Northampton (terrible geography snob back then) which seemed all wrong and then was irritated that The Cure were designated as largely Goth (as I was too for a little while; it was the make-up). I think the imagery here is definitely onside with that style/genre, not sure about the guitar. I do love the piano however, full of abandoned churches....
Very professional sounding. Not my basket of beetroots, but that's largely because of the vocal, which is certainly accomplished, but this style of singing, I dunno, sounds odd perhaps but I don't believe her. Sounds (to me) as though she mostly goes through the very efficient motions.....I would be interested in knowing how you put this together, I imagine working with an acapella track (or pieces anyway) must actually be somewhat of a technical challenge, probably far more than most of us would think.
I don't know where you hang your hat, but this feels/smells very West Coast, odd how sounds summon up places (especially if you recorded this in the snow of Pittsburgh rather than the sun of Huntington Beach or even San Bernadino)....I like it, but then I like your lazed-style. This piece actually comes across as more structured less fucked-up than previous contributions, and I'm not certain that's better, but then I like the chaos of things that feel almost live or one off. The flip of all that is that I can see you taking another run at this and tweaking it yet more so because it's pretty organized and there to be tweaked etc. Keep on.
This makes me happy. AND the rabbit. I think the reason it makes me happy is that I can feel your lightness doing it. I love your accented voice singing about Sylvia's. In a world where many of us are (consciously or otherwise) trying to be different, you actually achieve it while reviving an old style. Good stuff.
@jonnygoodyear Thanks man. Old man -> old Style ;-)
Following the feedback I've received I've updated my mix with less reverb, and the vocals mixed a little lower as well. I did go back to my Gadget file to see if longer notes on the bass were viable, but I didn't really like the results, so I have changed the compression settings on the bass instead to try and make it less staccato.
Will wait for this coffee to kick in and then go give another listen...are you happier with it?
@Franketti said:
Corrected that for you:
Old man -> old Style ;-)
I think so - it's more a case of trusting other (more objective) ears. One of the benefits of having a collaborator or a producer is that they can give you feedback, so this forum is pretty useful as a substitute for that. Sometimes you need another perspective, especially when it comes to details.
@halftone love the bass man it doesn't mud out the kick at all and all the frequencies have their home . Everything mixed up good in my ears,,, for me it might be a little too repetitive on the bass though.. that's just my preference
@theconnactic beautiful song, excellent skills. I really enjoyed this classical solo guitar entry .. wasn't expecting that I kept thinking drums were going to smash in any second but I'm glad they didn't it was perfect..
@richardyot thanks man, I appreciate it.. and it's not that I hate comparison, it's just that I go and listen to a lot of tracks by these artists and couldn't understand .. but it's what came to your mind which is what I really didn't think of.. if anything I should thank you for showing me new music
I can definitely see your eight year old kicking off a club into a dance off.. got some skills there hu