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New (v.3) song using AB2, MTD, Flying Haggis, iGrand, Auria, and Final Touch
This one is written for my daughter, Hayley. She's got a pretty big celebration coming up, and this song will be the music for one of those video montages, so the lyrics are a bit subjective, and the verses are slightly longer than I would normally write. It's my first recording with Flying Haggis, and I really like the tone on the electric guitar bits. Any feedback on the mix and performance is appreciated. I'd really like to know if I can get by with the vocals as they are. Thanks for listening. Edit - the drums are from The Loop Loft
Edit 2/16 - removed first and second versions from SoundCloud. Newest version below.
Comments
Nice piece. Not sure how you'd improve the vocals. Great mix. Yeah, that Flying Haggis does sound really nice.
If your concerned about the long verses, try playing with the arrangement. ...pulling out parts the first chunk and introducing them further into the verse. Think about how each piece of the arrangement supports the theme of the lyric. Be bold. Personally, I prefer longer verses/fewer choruses. I want the listener to want to hear the piece again, if it resonates with them.
I think it all works really well as it is. Very listenable and well performed and produced.
Beautiful, really moving, sounds great! I think she is going to be one happy girl
Add a harmony guitar to the lead breaks (or at least the outro) and another harmony vocal to the chorus, just to give em a lift
Nice track and arrangement, I like the tasteful guitar solos, as @Flo26 said: nice 70's vibe. If I were to tweak the vocals (having listened twice) it would be the tuning at 1.20 "bedtime" and 1.35 "dora." Other than that I'm fine with vocals that are earthy.
Great melody and production. It sounds good to me.
Thanks to everyone who listened and commented. I've always had more trouble with pitch on the slow numbers, which is why I asked for opinions. I'm singing the song over, and really thinking about the melody this time around, which I never do. Perhaps that's why I have pitch problems. I'll post again when I think I've got it. "Got it" is a subjective term as I can't expect miracles. Thanks again everyone.
I like it man! Sounded like I was listening to the radio. Great job!
Once again, thanks to everyone for listening and offering suggestions/critiques. I think this one's much better. I sang it over (lead and harmony) and added a third harmony to the choruses. Feedback on any of it is much appreciated. Thank you.
Edit - new mix 2.16.15
Love it! Really professional sounding and a lovely gift for your daughter!
Yeah, you've nailed it, also sounds more confident with the vocals and harmonies really popping out of the mix. Great job.
This much better Artie! Like all the arragements and vocal harmonies. I'd really like to collaborate with for your next song
You know, I love vocal harmonies!!
@Thomas, @Flo26, @Vecoto, @Tickletiger, @pangolin, @mkell424, @Musikman4Christ, @AlterEgo_UK, @Atlesbe - thanks all for your input. The extra work was really worth it for me. I learned a lot about crafting a melody because of this thread. You all really helped me out.
@Atlesbe - I'd like to collaborate. Thanks for the offer.
I agree...much better in lots of little ways that really add up to more than the sum. Well done bro!
:-)
@Thomas - Thanks for the kind words and for listening.