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Terminal Laughter Attack Nearly Kills Forum Member
This happens so rarely to me… laughing so hard I can’t catch my breath. It happened this morning reading about the fire on the Felicity Ace, a 650’ cargo ship carrying 1100 Porsches and 189 Bentleys off the coast of Spain.
Honestly, I don’t know why this has gotten to me, but it did. The 22 crew members were airlifted off and enjoying a hotel and walks on the beach in the Azores, but, lo, the luxury cars are burning from one end of the ship to the other.
This was amusing enough in an anti capitalist/materialistic way, but it was the plight of the guy below that started the paroxysms of hilarity…
“Matt Farah, a car enthusiast and editor of the Smoking Tire, is one of the customers who believes his vehicle is stuck at sea. Farah tweeted that he had been waiting since August for a 2022 Boxster Spyder that was modified to his specifications. The vehicle, which he declared as “the best sports car of all time, hands down,” has a retail price of about $123,000.
But when he got the call from his dealer, he was left disappointed and stunned….
“My car is now adrift, possibly on fire, in the middle of the ocean,” he wrote.
It was that last line that truly got me…
“My car is now adrift, possibly on fire, in the middle of the ocean“.
I had to think…
“My wife is now adrift, possibly on fire, in the middle of the ocean”
And then…
“My life is now adrift, possibly on fire, in the middle of the ocean”
I have to stifle the guffaws even now. The levels of absurdity are many and deep.
But is it that funny, or am I merely succumbing to the deterioration of a three quarter century mind? You tell me.
Comments
Thank you @tja… it doesn’t seem like many agree with us. It’s ten hours later and it still seems pretty funny. Maybe a bump will bring some more comments.🔥🔥🔥
I’m thinking “189 burning Bentleys” would make an excellent lyric — if not a proper song title!
Run with it, Lineman!
Of course you must begin the piece with that incredible quote:
“My car is now adrift, possibly on fire, in the middle of the ocean“
My only thoughts are the people living below the poverty line throughout the world. Their hearts must be breaking, know that these people may have just experiences something fairly, loosely, distantly related to suffering. Well maybe not. But I'm sure that if they had the means to even know this had happened they would say something like "What's a Bentley"?
It was ‘editor of the Smoking Tire’ that got me.
Fuckin’ A @qryss. It was all too perfect, like Garrison Keillor on acid. (I’m starting to laugh again!). Damn, life can be great…. Matt Farah (no less), editor of the Smokin’ Tire. … unbelievable!
There's nothing funny about this. The manufacturers aren't going to just eat this loss. They're going to pass it on to us, trust me.
The sticker shock on that next custom Porsche we need is going to be a real slap in the face. What can we do though? Can't keep driving this old 2021 clunker forever. 🤬
I might be able to pass on next year's Bentley just this once as long as the wife doesn't notice. Disparate times...
@wim… and you don’t think those cars were insured? Now Porsche get to sell them twice! Much good it does poor Matt Farah… he’s gonna have to wait another 8 months for his dream to come true. By then he could be dead from Covid… mmm… the next variant, anyway… the Alpha Romeo strain! 🤔😳🤣
I don't see anything funny about this either. The car company will absorb this loss, as will the workers at the Porsche factories, mostly in terms of lost labor. Porsche vehicles are hand-built by craftspeople who care about what they make. This is the equivalent of a museum of fine art being burned to the ground.
I looked it up: Only 272,162 of their vehicles are made a year. One more reason why they're so expensive. They're expensive because they are quality built, unlike the usual POS cars found on the roads.
"How can we dance
When our earth is turning?
How do we sleep
While our Bentley's burning?"
You experienced a pretty radical case of schadenfreude, @LinearLineman.
“My car is adrift. Possibly burning. In the middle of the ocean.”
I have a sinking feeling about the outcome of this thread.
I love the schadenfreude of the privileged petrol head, though I’m not keen on burning much in the ocean, and as has been said, it’s all insured so anyone who pays insurance will be crows funding the bill. I definitely sniggered at Farrah’s pain though 😁
@wim you may be right. Let me educate the spoilsports…
“My car is adrift. Possibly burning. In the middle of the ocean.” -Matt Farah, Editor, Smokin’’ Tires
That's funny. In fact, extremely funny.
That’s not funny. Not in the least. Now you know.
Meanwhile I've clocked 271,645 on my 2005 Ford Escape that cost under $20,000 new and on which I've spent less than $1,000 in repairs, which I guess you think is a POS, shoddily built by clumsy dorks who don't give a crap about what they make.
... oh and I've also gotten back a sizable portion of what I paid for the vehicle in returns on my Ford shares in the last year or so.
Don't worry @krupa, they're towing it into port. But it’s not schadenfreude. It’s not that I feel good poor Matt is suffering. It's the absurdity of a ridiculous dream (promulgated by Porsche as such) and a ridiculous set of values when they’re set afire.
But most of all…
My car is adrift. Possibly burning. In the middle of the ocean.
@wim… I think they had a car like that on board… mixed in with the Porsches and Bentleys. Guaranteed it will survive.
If so I hope that someone has compassion enough on Mr. Farah to offer it to him at a reasonable price to make up for his loss. Personally I'm feeling a bit guilty over the unfairness of my situation.
Were you up burning the midnight oil to come up with those words, @ervin ?
To be clear, most cars are a POS compared to a Porsche. Audi's are beautiful machines also (all part of VW Group, I might add). And I'm no car expert, but I can certainly appreciate beautiful craftsmanship and not revel in the destruction of someone else's property.
I totally get it man, and it’s also a lovely little poem for our times. Glad to hear they’re not letting it sink too 😁
Except that that picture is from 2018
https://www.forbes.com/sites/sebastienroblin/2021/12/28/reports-russia-is-drawing-down-troop-buildup-near-ukraine-are-mistaken/
First world problems…
@BiancaNeve, perhaps, but the 190,000 troops (or is it only 190] surrounding Ukraine I think are real.
👌
Nah, CET time zone, mate. 👊 Legit question though: the time has come to say fair's fair.
It is hilariously absurd.
Did Philip Roth secure a writing gig in the afterlife?
It easily rivals “And The Hippos Were Boiled in Their Tanks”
Good motoring! I’ve clocked 245,000 on my 2005 Ford Focus so far which I bought for just £3,000. And yeah, very little repair and maintenance required over the years. 2005 must have been a particularly good year! I bought it in 2010 with 73,000 on the clock. Still showing no signs of stopping! 😃