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Comments
Thanks for the feedback. I totally agree with the bass, I am going to redo and re upload. I was thinking of reworking some of the drums as well along with your and @richardyot 's notes. Thanks guys!
@JohnnyGoodyear - Liked your tune. wouldn't make any changes to the structure, length, or unpolishedness of it; however, you might consider experimenting with some Lo-Fi filtering/saturation on the vocals-- make it feel like rough is just how you landed it.
@richardyot - about Lights
Great produced, great mixed. The overall sound is great. As in your last song. Well sung also, the voice also greatly placed in the mix. I like your voice! A nice relaxed athmosphere. Not very catchy though, but this is subjective of course. But the overall sound - which is great - compensates. A bit too much bass perhaps (only heard that when listening on my high end headphones, on my cheap phones it sounded alright). Your mixing skills have greatly improved in my opinion.
My guess is that you spend a lot of time/energy working on technical stuff. But less time/energy on composition. I am NOT saying it is boring, but - theoretically we can ask yourselves: what is better: a badly recorded great and catchy song, or a great sound with a boring composition?
If you want to be a sound producer/engineer, then spending time on mixing is a good investment. I decided (for myself) that I want to spend as little time as possible on tweaking stuff. It is mostly that last few % (to get the mix very good) that costs a lot of time. I prefer a less perfect mix which has a good or great and/or catchy composition. I want to work more from my creative universe than from my technical brain. An argument against this is: once you have learned to get a great mix, the time spend becomes less and less. But perhaps by then your focus on making music is technically orientated.
To have the best of both worlds would be ideal. Thomas Dolby is a master in this, in my opinion.
@JohnnyGoodyear - about Wake Up Blues
I like it! Great bluesy athmosphere! Well produced. Could use a variation in the composition though, but thats my preference in songs. But - just come to the last minute of the song - there is a variation (only rythm section). Nice! Still a variation in the chords makes it better in my opinion.
Thanks @Marcel @asnor @Igneous1 et al for kind comments, encouragement and suggestions. Music of all kinds is a feeling and emotional matter. I struggled with writing a verse/chorus/long-winded piece this month. I'm grateful for what I learned, a bit fed-up that it wasn't as good as I expected it to be, sanguine that I'm not an engineer/producer etc.
Last night, still fed up with too much thinking about it all, I recorded another piece, just atmosphere and short really, full of frustration but also (weirdly) good memories. I place it here because it belongs in August and also, by doing so, I won't be tempted to recycle it and fudge it out for September
Mostly Earhoof, a little Gadget, some ifretless.
Come get it
@Igneous1 , @richardyot, and @johnnygoodyear: I took your feedback and reworked some stuff. Do you mind giving it another go?
@BvsMV More depth, more meaning (even if I don't know what). Complexity unified. Second act (minute and a half in) maybe not as strong as the first, the game noises were too predictable (the same) for me. Third act, 3.20 and out, good. Piano a plus. Instinct would be shorten act 2 and lengthen 3, but I'm beyond my probable purview. Good effort and an improvement to an already decent piece.
And yes, I'd like wailing or lyrics or samples or something word-like in there too, but then that's just me
Thanks for your honesty, this is exactly the kind of feedback I need.
The only catchy song I've managed to write so far was "This is Just a Test" from a couple of months ago - and of course I have no idea how I did it. I think the secret is just to keep writing more songs and just see how things develop.
My own feelings about this month's song is that it's a worthy effort, but not quite there. That's fine though, I know from experience that it takes time to get good at things, so I will try again next month, and the month after. In the meantime I can see that in the 8 months I've been doing SOTMC I've improved enormously in several areas, so at least I am traveling in the right direction, even if I haven't reached the destination. But please keep giving me honest feedback.
@JohnnyGoodyear this one is definitely strong on atmosphere, and I do really like the artiness and emotion of it, but again it's a fragment.
I think the recurring theme in your work is that you struggle to fit more than one idea into a song - you don't seem to be able to move from one mood into another. I'm not saying that you should write verse/chorus type songs if that's not your thing, but it would be good to hear some sense of progression and journey in your work, I really think it would make it much more powerful.
@BvsMV the intro is now so much better, with the different elements being introduced more gradually there is a much greater sense of progression in the track and that makes it much more satisfying to listen too. The rhythm parts are also a little more subdued which helps - some of the rhythms are still a little jarring to my ears but less so than before, and don't seem to overpower the melodies as much.
Thanks for listening again. I really appreciate the feedback, and I am much happier with throwing this out in the world. As for vocals, I even tried on this one I just couldn't get the time space for some good ones.
I really like your track. Reminds me of a more electronic Nick Cave song. I don't think it is too long because I really enjoy your lyrics. You have enough little nuances, vocal inflections, etc to change up the repetition. The change/breakdown around 4 minutes is nice. I liked that drop out, percussion change a lot. I probably would have rode that out until the end, while adding some other nuances instead of bringing the main melody back in. Good job!
Thanks for listening again. I'm glad I redid the intro, I originallyslammed it all in there trying to keep the song under four minutes and honestly just being tired with editing in Cubasis on an iPad 3. This is what SoM is for, I'm much happier now with it!
As for your track, I'm really enjoying this. I get the 90s shoegaze, downtempo vibe. At some points I feel like there is too much auto tune, but I really am enjoying your vocals overall and they have improved immensely. The breakdown, "solos" at 2:30 are great, I could have grooved on that for another couple of minutes. Great work!
@Matt_Fletcher_2000 Hey man,another excellent entry! That pluck noise at the beginning was for me like popping bubble rap...very satisfying!:D great mix,everything to me seemed in its right place.Nice job! I'm looking forward to yours and Johnnys mashup!
@JohnnyGoodyear,Wake up blues-great blending of the voices mate.Lyrically engaging as always.
Great job for just getting it finished.At least now as you said you can just let it go and move onto the next one.which leads me to 'come get it' a very tasty snack! Atmospheric as always and great visuals which always help me connect with your stuff.I did think some of the vocal was too loud but hey no biggie.It sounds to me like you are accomplishing your goals,which is what it's all about right?:)
@Richardyot 'sinking slowly' for me is the catchiest song you've done.I still find myself singing that two months on:)
Thanks - that's interesting actually, and since you're all about catchy I will take that on board and revise my opinion.
Appreciate your opinion. I tend to think I have too many ideas, but -of course- I'm thinking lyrically, not musically, for the most part. Maybe that's part of the problem. Or maybe it's not a problem, just my own area of deficit or weakness and thus something that might be worth focusing on. Not so much verse/chorus (maybe), but development, change, resolution etc. Whatever that may look (or sound) like...it's a tough one, the benefit of the focus/discipline is good technically (I am certainly learning, especially about various apps), but it's also true that we each probably have different goals or intentions with this exercise. The balance of the effort with enjoyment (for me) is important also... Have to see what September brings
@LostBoy85 Thanks for the listen. 'Come get it' is def. a snack
or a stiff chaser from memory...
@BvsMV Appreciate your comments. I remember Nick Cave talking about the Old Testament once and feeling somewhat intimidated by his zeal. Not a bad thing to aspire to (in my own strange book
....
What do you write first - music or words?
@johnnyGoodyear,
'Come get it'
Wasn't developed enough as an idea for me. I listened to it without the video - as it should be (?)
Thanks for listening. As mentioned, it was more of palate cleanser between courses. And probably better with the video....I think, as also indicated, I was being selfish a little by posting it to stop myself expanding it here and there and then posting it as 'September'
Cheers for responding positively.
I've made a point of making a critique of every song on this months SOTMC. I have to say, I don't think I'II be doing it again. I don't know how useful it all is as an exercise. Perhaps I should have just stuck to making technical observations (?), part of me really doesn't like criticising other people's work here on any other level than that...
@Igneous1 if you're not comfortable being critical that's fine - although honestly I can't recall anyone on here ever taking a critique badly (or at least responding negatively or defensively). Technical crits are just as helpful as creative ones IMO - I've improved my mic technique from comments posted in previous months, and LostBoy85 has given me some good de-essing tips this month.
But it's cool to contribute and respond. I think that anyone who takes the time to listen to a track and give constructive criticism (and praise where appropriate) deserves respect. For a start it's incredibly time-consuming to listen to every submission several times and give a thoughtful response.
When people just post their own tracks and then don't give any feedback on other people's work I think it's pretty lame and just attention-seeking rather than taking part in a constructive process.
Giving and receiving feedback can also help the actual skills of songwriting and composing. I think the sharing of disparate ideas and processes probably helps to grow and open everyone's minds in the end.
@Igneous1 I agree with our fearless leader on this one. I think contributing is a major part of the thing here. I do also agree that a separation between personal views (It made me throb! or I fell asleep!) and technical considerations are also valid. Personally, I like the personal reactions/responses, but also just 'take them under advisement' because, after all, everyone's got toast
The key is intention, in so far as the vast majority of the feedback shared here in the months SOTMC has been going has been almost entirely devoid of the more typical internet (or life!) pissing contest. We're all here to help. Offer our most honest and constructive opinions along with any technical suggestions or ideas that any piece might bring to mind.
If the source is sincere, questions or criticism can be very useful. To be honest, I find the very fact that I know a number of folks here will be encouraging where appropriate but also hold my feet to the friendly fire a benefit in helping me be more honest and constructive about the weaknesses and areas of possible improvement relevant to any piece even before I post it.
Oh, and to the whole room, it's, er, August 31st. Still time. Just saying....
Do SOTMC submissions need to be all iOS, or can we mix it up?
I'm just as interested in subjective responses as I am technical crit. Probably more so.
That's why this group is so great I think.
I agree that people shouldn't just post tracks and not give any feedback. That's not really cricket.
Could we also perhaps wait a few days before the Sep thread is created? A lot of people post right at the end of the month and it seems like the thread changes almost immediately and those tracks get a bit forgotten.
I still have most of August's to comment on too
.
Oh and also - thanks again to @Richardyot for:
Mix it up - in fact I don't think iOS is really a requirement!
@Matt_Fletcher_2000 You're welcome
@Igneous1 - about Gilded Hero
Reminds me of Japan/David Sylvian. Interesting sound sculpture.